Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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