If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
