carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
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