We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
