I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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