if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
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