The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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