i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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