did you get engaged???
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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