This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm getting married
To pizza
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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