so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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