You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
They are going to name an STD after you.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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