K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
