I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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