i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I've blown a few things in my day
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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