the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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