My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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