Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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