ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
