yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
