That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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