i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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