Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize