And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
