Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
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just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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