party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
So squirting runs in the family.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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