VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
