I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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