whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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