I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Do vagina's smell?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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