hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize