Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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