you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Randomize
