Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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