So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
