how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize