How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she looked like the before picture.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
How's work?
Spinning.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize