we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
