Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
