And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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