my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
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