My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
