Dual....:-)
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
