did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Your cock deserves a montage
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Randomize
