My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
