Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
