Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
it glows. i had to have it.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
