D3 body, D1 cock
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
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