i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize