I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
