Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize