No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
