She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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