Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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