love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
